How Has Paganism Affected Your Family Relationships?
Religion affects everything in our lives. What we believe influences the way we think, speak, write, even what we eat. A simple triangle, for example, may represent something different for Catholics and Buddhists. Have you ever heard a Muslim say “Merry Meet”? Or seen a Krishna eat meat?
But no other aspect in our lives does religion affect us most profoundly than in the relationships we create and maintain. Exactly how is subject to a deeper dissertation, but for starters, we asked our staff and contributors the following questions:
How has paganism affected your relationship with your family?
Or if your family doesn't know that you're pagan, how has paganism changed the way you see your family members?
This is how they answered:
Well it affects us in good ways. Like of course tarot is essential to a witch… so I hold 5 tarot decks and my mother sometimes asks me to give her a reading when she has a problem. So that’s how it affects us in good ways.
The bad thing is that I failed in one of my subjects in school. It affects my studies in bad ways sometimes. But mostly it serves us good things.
I came from a Christian oriented family and yes they don't know that I am in fact a pagan. Well, technically they don't because I am in complete denial to such practices...but I can't deny they’re suspicious though...a couple times I got caught with my ritual tools but just what shaggy always says..."WASN'T ME!"
Unlike most pagans, my conversion was really a tough one. Somehow I can say that things aren't they way it used to be when I was still a Christian. My understanding has widened and my beliefs became more of ideals and for once, I can say I am finally living my faith. But probably the one thing that changed the way I see my family is the way I look at my relationship with them. In the past I was used to the concept of "the family that prays together stays together" and I was comfortable with that kind of set up. But everything changed when I became a pagan, I started to look for meaning in relationships. I started to raise questions, advocate my rights to religion, what was going on, why are you in complete denial of this and that...dark secrets...and things that I wasn't 'expected' to ask my family.
They say enlightenment has a price...and I guess my case is no exception. I can't deny the gap I’ve made over the years between me, my parents, and the rest of the family. Ever since I got involved in dark committees and late night journeys, I have been branded the "big-black-toad-in-the-witches-kitchen" by most of my relatives. I was harshly judged by the people whom I expected to be on my side in this matter. And yes, I can't also deny the sleepless nights thinking of running away, sinister thoughts of joining Bin Laden just to give my dad a heart attack. But somehow over the years of practicing the ancient ways I came to learn how to blend with my family. Come to think of it, being the black toad wasn't a bad thing after all, at least now I came to know my family better.
I've proven by experience that changing one's spiritual preference isn't easy as changing one's clothes. From the very beginning, I already anticipated my parents’ reactions once they find out that their only begotten son, who has been very religious his whole pre-pubescent life, is now a pagan.
I recalled during the earlier times when I really had to keep my practices and ritual equipment as clandestine as possible to avoid non-stop quarrels with my very patient and understanding father. Even if I managed to escape Sunday mass, I surely wouldn't miss my dad's daily gospel. Mom, on the other hand, secretly talked to our guidance counselor, hoping to save her son from something she thought was "devilish."
After proving to them that my new found spirituality is beneficial (a series of A's and grades not below 83), they didn't bother me anymore. Now you will be surprised to know that my mom is reading my witchy books during her free times.
Being a Pagan is not bad as it sounds. Pagans sometimes are more refined compared to other people who don't believe in it. For it is in Paganism that I understood the meaning of life and death as well, and in here I learned to develop my well being and keeping my spirituality intact.
But I have to admit that I am not truly a Pagan for reasons that only my friends and my co-members of my group know. I am not against Paganism but I just choose not to. My mother knew a bit about my practice though, and so does my siblings. My father, on the other hand doesn't know about it nor does he believe in my abilities. I merge my psychic ability with my knowledge in the craft and together it helps to bring harmony in our lives. And since most of my family members are psychics, I use it to ward spirits that sometimes distract and frighten my two younger sisters. But I've since laid low for quite sometime now. Though I used to manipulate things around the house for luck to be in our favor.
Well, there are advantages and disadvantages to every decision, especially something as major as religion in our culture. But respect is one of the cornerstones of any good relationships, and as long as “ye harm none,” including yourself, you’ll be just fine.
How has YOUR beliefs affected your family relationships? Take some time to think about it.
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posted by Manggagaway @ 7:31 AM
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